Note To Mr. Lincoln
Dear Mr. Lincoln of the United States of America,
This is General Lee, of the Confederate States of America, and even though we are on opposite sides of the war, I would like to talk to you, one man to another. The issue near to my heart is one that is carelessness in your army. As a Westpoint graduate, I am a very militarized man, so I believe that all promotions in any army must be done with utmost precision and care, as to not make the rank of a soldier meaningless. It has come to my awareness that there are four regiments that plan to have everyone in their regiment promoted. I believe that these regiments are not worthy of promotion doing to the fact that, despite outnumbering our Confederate forces two to one, the only victory they gained was by the inefficiency of one of our southern regiment leaders. I know that we are on opposite sides of the war, but sometimes, the wisest course of action is to listen to those who’s side you are not on. Speaking of which, it has recently come to my attention, that Corporal Thomas Ward Jr of the regiment known as God’s Legionnaires, has been a huge asset to helping you and your army attempt to win this war. So therefore, I believe he would be a good man to promote if you want to boost morale, and recognize excellent leadership.
Robert E Lee
Confederate States of America